Hold my Frozen Heart
by Nixoma
Summary: Two worlds that should never meet come together.  Two individuals that should have stayed separated fall in love.  And two hearts that should have stayed whole have broken open.  Through politics and social law, will love prove unbreakable or...?
1. Chapter 1

It sure looked longer on Microsoft Word.

Anyway, hello all, it sure has been a long time since I've posted anything. This was actually written a while back, but I recently revisited it and made corrections.

Now, I am absolutely confident that this story will never be finsihed, I started on a whim and the spark dissapeared very quickly. Though, I am proud of the little that I did write, and I hope you enjoy it. There will be about two more chapters of the same length.

Please comment, thanks you :)

* * *

"I take dibs on that Inoue Orihime chick!" Raucous laughter came from the red head seated on the faded couch in front of me. "Yo! Buddy, how about you?" I quickly realized that this buddy of his just happened to be me, considering the fact that there was no other occupant in the room at the time. Oh, the joy.

"I really don't see what the big deal is. She's just another woman." A rather annoying woman, to be precise. Hearing my all-to-casual response, he swerved on the couch to face me; an exasperated sigh escaped his lips.

"Aw, c'mon man. Don't be like that." He jumped lithely to the back of the couch, teetering on the edge, suddenly intent on my rebuttal. I nearly rolled my eyes at the sight of him. Red braided hair, long enough to resemble that of a ditzy high school girl. A black bandana kept various flyaway strands from aggravating his eyes. He wore a black collared shirt, black trousers, and black steel-toed boots…probably black undergarments too…but I had far too much dignity to confirm my suspicions. His eyes were a curious shade of grey. Probably a similar color to my own… that is, if I actually knew their color or had the audacity to ask.

"She's another woman. Any will serve their purpose." I shrugged, uninterested with where this conversation was headed.

"Well, you've gotta admit, she must taste sweet with a body like that! I mean have you seen the size of that rack!" I involuntarily stiffened. Of course! Leave Renji to deduce that a woman's cup size would have an impact on her _taste_.

"If I do have a choice in the matter, I'd prefer one with a brain in her skull."

"Ah, well, guess it can't be helped. You've fallen for the _smart_ variety. What can I say…? Unless…that is… you've reconsidered my opinion on a mental institution." He slid back onto the couch, laying his head on his arms and closing his eyes. I growled. One day, I was going to rip the moron's head off…slowly…painfully…

"Have you decided when yet?" I asked through gritted teeth, still seething.

"Hmm? Inoue? I don't think I can go much longer, so probably tonight. She walks home alone every Friday night anyway. There shouldn't be too many people around."

"I suggest you leave Inoue Orihime be, Abarai." A new being joined the party, his voice harsh. Interesting, I should have noticed him coming; Ishida was getting better at this.

"So…Ishida has feelings for the female. Always said you were going soft man." He glared in response, his glasses falling from his nose slightly. Obviously, those were for show. We all had above perfect eyesight.

I took in the little nerd. He had dark hair that shone in the dim light of the room. He wore rimless glasses, a black blouse, black pants, and black dress shoes …black…

I looked down at my own attire, black shirt, black overcoat, black jeans and black sneakers. I thought back to my wardrobe, all black.

Black: the color of death. Well, it seemed to fit. After all, this heart hadn't beaten for centuries; hence, I was dead…well, undead, technically. I wasn't a normal human being; actually I wasn't even human at all. I was something else, something much more…_sinister_…yes that was a good way to describe someone who preyed on innocents and killed them ruthlessly.

"So where ya been? I mean, I come home one night and no weasel comes to greet me. I was devastated!" There was a light growl from the opposing party.

"That would be none of your business, Abarai."

"What…you go harass those European women you love so much? Dude, I told ya… they don't want ya!" There was a crack as Ishida's fist collided with Renji's shoulder, narrowly missing his head.

The fight faded into the background of my mind.

This body was strong, fast and homicidal. No human could possibly stand a chance against me. In my arsenal I carried claws that could mangle titanium, fangs that could tear through steel, and venom, with enough poison in one bite to take out a good hundred people. I was the perfect weapon.

And this life, that had spanned millennia, seemed never-ending. For all the time that I had lived, I had nothing to show for it, not a single wrinkle, nor crease. And for one who lived of the death's shoulder, death was the only thing denied to me. Swords could not pierce me, gravity could not crush me and water could not drown me, there was no end, no light at the end of the tunnel, just an abyss of black that stretched on into infinity.

Although, I could deal with living…it was the craving…the insatiable thirst…the bloodlust that made me despise my very existence. Around every two weeks the others of my kind and I would need to feed, or go mad with hunger. I, personally didn't mind animal blood, but when you lived in downtown Tokyo, Japan, well…animals were scarce and humans abundant.

I would lure a human away to our apartment –our, of course meaning Abarai Renji, Ishida Uryuu and I- or down an alley where there would be no witnesses. Women mostly, who were completely hypnotized with my appearance, my voice, and what they though I could offer them…they could never have been so wrong in their short lives.

There was a name, close enough to what we were…vampire.

But there was the hitch. The others of my kind would drain one body of its blood, then leave. I could not hope to be so lucky. I would take my prey, but the moment a drop of blood spilled from the body, I would black out. I would awaken to find myself somewhere else in the city, once even, in another country, and a horrid trail of bodies; vampires and humans alike, that followed me into the belly of hell itself. I would be covered in blood, my thirst satisfied, but there would be a terrible ringing in my ears. The ringing of screams.

That's why I was here in Tokyo…there was something I wanted, and only one person in the world could indulge me.

"It is refreshing to see that your foolishness has not changed in the time I have been away, Abarai." I grimaced, only slightly vexed that my internal monologue had been interrupted.

"Ha! Man, I wish you could have been away longer! You know no nagging, no nasally voice clawing at my eardrums. It was sweet." I watched as Ishida's clenched his fists, piqued by the jabs.

"Well Abarai, I implore you that your presence was neither desired nor missed during my absence. It was congenial."

Renji and I groaned, I decided it was time to say something. "Dude, we live in the 21st century now, can you start acting like it?"

"Kurosaki, it would appear that you forget that I have lived during the 19th and 20th as well."

"Um, so did we… actually berry boy here lived through the 18th too, you and I came along later." I snarled at the mention of my given nickname. Ichigo, contrary to my situation meant 'one who protects' not berry boy.

"Hmph. Regardless, I believe that I have acquired the necessary vocabulary for this century, thank you."

But, he was right… we had lived for so long, time meant nothing.

As much as I tried to keep away from such thoughts, I couldn't help but wonder if this unnatural and ugly life would ever end. This body had not aged in the slightest, but this mind had…

These eyes, sharp and precise, had witnessed war, gruesome bloodshed, events where only I had survived. And of course, such a memory as this did not forget a single detail. Not the dampening of the red blood that soaked the earth, not a muffling of the terrified cries, or the feeling of cold, lifeless bodies of once living, happy people, all of this, despite my misery, had never faded.

Ah yes, misery, sadness, and mourning. Well, despite what was being popularized in books and movies nowadays, it was very possible for a 'vampire' to feel emotions…it was just that we preferred to ignore them and become stoic beings. We would rather sacrifice our emotions rather that our sanity…or what was left.

Another cracking sound and someone gasped.

"You weasel! I'll rip your scrawny head off!"

Thus, proving my point exactly.


	2. Chapter 2

So, it's been a while since I put anything up ... I feel bad. Well, here's the second chapter, I certainly hope you like it. I apologize if Rukia or Ichigo are a little out of character, it's surprisingly difficult to portray them correctly ... anyways, there will only be one short installment after this chapter, and again, I promise you this story will never be completed. What I have written now is all I'll ever write on this story.

Comments are always appreciated. Thank you :)

* * *

Ugh, how boring and mundane this life could be. Day to day, I would go to class, dressed in the uniform I despised so very much, come home, sit around and finish homework, or hit the gym and damage a newbie's ego so badly they would never return.

I briskly walked from the building that had me prisoner for a good nine hours, Tokyo University.

That was right. Kuchiki Rukia, studying to be corporate attorney at law! Yup, now despite the annoyance I felt towards my classes, I was rather proud of my position. I had been ranked top of my class since my first year. I had skipped over kindergarten and graduated high school when I was seventeen. Immediately after, I entered the University and studied law – under the recommendation of my brother, of course-… I was Kuchiki Rukia, age 22.

So, back to the task at hand: deciding what to do with my evening. Well, I was feeling a little rebellious so I figured I'd go to the gym, have a few sparing rounds, come home, dress up a bit and head for a bar somewhere, after all, it was Friday.

I fumbled in my pockets, searching for the keys to my condo. When I found them, I hastily jerked the door opened and stumbled inside, all too eager to reach the one place I could finally relax.

I reached my couch, flopped down, kicked off my heels and groaned. What a long day this had been…such a routine, dull day at the university. Answering all the questions asked of me, studying and completing term papers, but, of course I had completed all my assignments with sheer efficiency.

I grabbed the remote of the couch and flipped on the television. Nothing of particular interest, a few more terrorist attacks, Barrack Obama being named president of the United States… it was all so repetitive. And so, I turned of the TV and ambled off to my bedroom.

So, my plan of action was to hit the gym, therefore, I would need gym attire. I shrugged out of my stiff uniform, grey skirt, grey jacket and a frilly little red ribbon to match. I pulled on my basketball shorts and a tank top and laced my runners. I shuffled out the door, headed towards the metro station.

* * *

"So, you coming with?" Renji was now seated in front of me, in the midst of popping his shoulder back into place, courtesy of Ishida. But of course, Ishida himself hadn't escaped unscathed either; he was currently nursing a broken jaw. It was a good thing we healed fast, or else I'd have killed them both this second for their sheer stupidity. But because they were only minor injuries, they'd heal in and hour or so.

"Renji, you know I can't do that." I sighed; Renji was irritating me by asking a question he already knew the answer to.

"Well, you've been getting better! At least you don't leave the city anymore!" He sounded like an excited puppy…except bloodthirsty…and emotionless… and dead…

Ishida cocked an eyebrow as if to intervene, but was stopped immediately by his jaw. I couldn't help but snicker. "Honestly though Renji, I don't think whether I leave the country or not is any indicative that I won't kill you."

"How long have you gone?" He was being threatened with a _second_ death and he was still arguing with me!

"'Bout twelve days." I answered honestly, not even needing to stop to remember the last time I had fed. It was constantly in the front of my mind.

"You've gotta be thirsty by now man!" Thirsty was an understatement, I was straddling insanity at the moment. But I refused to let that _thing _control me and kill innocent people and my own kind. Until I found a way to rid myself of _it_, I would hunt alone and around as few people as possible.

"…Renji… no." This conversation was putting quite a damper on my mood.

"But what if we-"

"NO! You've been there Renji! You know that I almost killed you! And now you expect me to try again?" Renji was silent, his dark eyes focused on the floor.

He had been there…he knew what I was like when that thing took over my body. He was the one who had told me of the creature I became. The pain I had caused him. And I was now expected to hurt him again? I couldn't do it… not after regaining control of my body and seeing Renji half dead in front of me. Sprawled on the pavement, his limbs all but torn off, gashes everywhere…he was such a mess…and it hurt to know that I did that to him.

But, to Renji's credit, he never left my side, or even cringed as I came into a room. He joked with me as if I hadn't almost butchered him. My assault on him was about two years ago, but never once did he hate me for what I had done to him, and for that, I was eternally grateful.

I turned towards the window, the moon was out.

"I'll be on the south side; you know that bar, 'Kimi No Na o Yobu'?"

"Yeah, the one that sounds like you have a hangover?"

"That's where I'll be. Stay away and I'll see you in a few days." With that said I flung open the window and leapt into the night.

* * *

So, the gym had been a waste of time. The only sparing partners I could find were of the all-too-eager rookie type, looking for a fight. When I finally got over the fact that I wasn't going to be getting a good fight in tonight, I challenged one of the boisterous men, speaking a little too loudly about the last busty blond he'd taken home with him. Obviously, he had been no challenge, I mean, I left the dojo with one or two bruises and he left with the ambulance. So, now barely sweaty, I headed for home.

Once there, I slid out of my gym clothes into something a little more…attractive.

Rule of thumb, should anyone use the word 'sleazy', I break their face.

And in all honesty, grow up kiddies, a white dress, a little makeup and some accessories should be nothing to throw a fit over. I never could see how men lost their minds over a woman squeezed into the smallest, most revealing outfit they could find. I just couldn't make sense of it all, wouldn't a man pride himself on having a woman that was beautiful and had a little character? A few brain cells perhaps? But, in today's society, where anorexic women in bikinis ruled…there wasn't a chance.

Once done with my touchups, I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked good, really good. I had never been one of the women who kept telling herself over and over 'I am pretty. I am pretty. I am pretty…' Nope, if I looked hideous the morning before school, I would make a mental note of this and then march out the door.

Well, I was almost ready to leave…just one final thing to do. I walked to my room, decorated in white and lavender, grabbing my holster from my dresser. I slid it up my thigh, and then walked to my locked nightstand. Jamming the key into the hole, I unlocked the compartment and reached into a black velvet box. Ah, there they were… my most prized possessions…my dagger collection.

I pulled my personal favorite from the box. My Reg Cooper Sykes Fairbairn British Dagger. It was my sharpest, deadliest knife, and great for throwing. I pulled it from the box, examining its condition, not a scratch on it. Of course, it had been used…once or twice…I had never killed anybody with it…I only ever used it in self defence, not that I needed it very often, usually my fists and legs were enough.

I slid the dagger into the holster, and with a small smile, headed off towards my favourite bar, Kimi No Na o Yobu.

* * *

I stared at the crowd through emotionless eyes. There were many people milling around the street. There were couples on the street, some teenagers, just starting out, and some were elders who had been there to watch the world age. There were groups of friends jumping around, prodding one another, making jokes. There were singles that searched for partners in the bars. They were humans. They were people.

They were all people that I would kill tonight. Intentionally or not, their lives were over the moment they decided to walk out their doors this evening. They were all people that had separate lives, their own hardships and joys…

And I hated myself for being the one to take that from them.

Because I exist, innocent people must die. Because I exist, that small child, waiting for her parents to come home from the bar, will be forever lonely. Because I exist, their lives are forfeit.

It would not be a problem if I was like the others and could merely drink my fill and leave. No, I would take many…all because of that _thing_ that lurked within me.

I would crush it. Some way, somehow, I would destroy it.

I walked solemnly into the bar. The lights were a little too bright for my sharp eyes, and the music was a little too loud for my tuned ears, but soon enough, those sensations would fade. I strolled through the crowd, my body not bumping a single person. I was searching for my prey. The one I would lure away to begin my feast.

It would be a woman, considering they were the easiest to persuade…not that coercing a man would be very difficult. I could convince even the most virile man to swing the other way for me…it _had_ happened. I glided through the faceless crowd, looking for one that would grasp my attention.

It was only a little while later that I found her. Midnight hair with silky, pale skin that would glow in the moonlight. She was dancing, her body moving to the music, her hips bouncing, and a radiant smile on her face. She was beautiful.

I felt a godlike force pulling me closer. I absentmindedly pushed my way through the crowd towards her, my eyes always focused on that woman. Her glistening teeth, her full, red lips and her wonderful nose were all so appealing. Her glistening hair, her glorious body, the way she moved, she was delicious.

Her dainty feet flew across the dance floor, keeping in time with the rapid beat of the music. Her perfect hands cut through the air… luscious.

I was lusting for her…for her blood.

She spun suddenly, turning to face me, and I met her violet stare.

* * *

Divinity stood before me…in what I could only hope was authentic Italian leather. I had never seen a man so beautiful in all my life. Not celebrities on television, not models strutting around in undergarments, not even statues of the most beautiful men could compare. It was as if he had been hand painted by the gods.

He was lean and muscular, with skin that seemed silky to touch. His powerful legs were accented by his dark jeans. He had a muscle-bound chest that was worship worthy. His athletic arms waited for a command to tear someone limb from limb. His chiseled jaw was set firmly along with a set of full petal soft lips. His eyes were a gorgeous golden brown and his hair was wonderfully unique, with a color that seemed to fit: vibrant orange.

He was handsome, but that seemed to be about it. Upon further inspection I noticed his eyebrows were furrowed angrily and his mouth had a slight downward curve to it. He had to be one of the superficial types who looked like he was made of pure gold but had the personality of a pebble.

But nonetheless, I stopped dancing and moved towards him slowly. If I could only touch him, I'd be satisfied. He looked at me intently and, with a voice akin to the choirs of heaven asked, "Would you like to dance?"

In my stupor I only managed a nod.

The song came to and end and we both remained stock still. As a new one started he gave me a smirk and began to dance. His timing was absolutely perfect, his body moved with each half beat. The clean and swift movements had my mind spinning, the way his hips could move, the way his arms could extend and bend in such a short time span, and the way his face remained unstrained, besides the frown, throughout the entire time. Unfortunately, it led me to think of other things this man could do.

To my surprise he suddenly stopped moving and looked me over. "Do you not dance?" There it was again, that velvety voice. He cocked an eyebrow at my lack of response.

"Ah, yes." If it was even possible, his eyebrow rose further and the smirk grew.

"Allow me to assist you if you're shy." He grinned knowingly, as if he had done this a thousand times before.

Before I had time to protest, his hands had closed around my hips and he had pulled me closer. His icy hands sent shivers up my spine as he gently moved his wrists, coaxing me to move. Slowly my hips began to sway in his palms, my eyes still plastered to his smirking face. His hands moved faster to match the tempo and my hips kept beat. Surprisingly, I wasn't embarrassed that a complete stranger was touching me this way, it just felt so right.

Clearly satisfied with my pace he tantalizingly slid his hands up my sides, causing my back to arch slightly, and moved to my immobile arms. He moved them above my head, stoking them gently until my arms were moving in time with my hips.

"That's it." He released me and, to my dismay, took a step back and looked me over as if admiring a piece of art.

He reached out and put a calloused hand on my shoulder and before I knew it he had spun me around and pulled me to him. He lowered his mouth to my ear, his lips lightly brushing it, and whispered, "Now, let's get you legs moving."

Our hips moved together and I almost groaned at the sensation. His hands held me to his firm chest as our shoulders jerked to the rhythm. That's when he slowly moved his hand to my thigh. He moved his hand up and down, lifting my billowy dress a little higher every time.

People were staring. Women were drooling and men were gawking as our display, but in all honesty, I couldn't care less.

His second hand came to my thigh and I stiffened slightly as his hand came high enough to rest on my dagger holster. In response, he lowered his lips to my ear and whispered, "Don't worry. Please don't be afraid of me." And it was the way he said it that made me think otherwise.

* * *

No, no, no, no, no! Bad, bad, bad! Feeling is bad! Emotion is bad! And what the heck was with the formal speech? I just didn't do things like that! Nuh-uh, not my style.

Gee, why didn't I just slap an electric dog collar on my neck and learn some common sense. Really now…

The woman's body became rigid against mine, and it was too bad really. I hadn't felt anything that close to pleasure in a long time.

Wait…no, no, no, wrong! She was food… a snack… dinner on a dance floor! I had to remind myself what happened last time I felt this good. Yeah, those types of memories would be just as good as any electric collar.

Despite my newfound restraint, I still couldn't pull myself away from the woman and just gouge her throat out.

She was afraid, of course. Any sane and sober human should be when a complete stranger finds your one method of escape. I could hear the thumping of her heart quickening, see imperceptible amounts of perspiration on her neck, feel the slight tremble in every breath and smell her fear.

Although this captivating woman would cease to exist shortly, I really wanted to make her last few minutes enjoyable and worry free. Why? Not a clue… but there was something about this female that pushed me to do so.

I tightened my hold on her waist, and she made a noise, much like a dog's chew toy. I couldn't help but smirk as I lowered my lips to her ear and allowed my tongue to slide along the shell. She quivered against me. Her heartbeat was erratic, large drops of sweat were now on her neck and her breathing was uneven. Although I couldn't tell if this new series of bodily reactions were related to pleasure or to even more fear. Time to test that out.

I released her suddenly, taking my hands off her waist and pushing myself away from her body. She spun to look at me, a whimper escaping her lips. I smirked and extended a hand towards her, "Come here." I whispered and she looked into my eyes.

Oh yes, definitely pleasure.

She clamored for my hand as if it were a lifeline. I danced out of her grasp, flashing a seductive grin. "But before that, what's your name?" She came towards me again, but I stepped away, maybe a bit too fast, the humans might have gotten suspicious.

" K-Kuchiki Rukia…I-" I came towards her as a reward for obeying me. I pulled her smooth and delicate arms around my neck and settled my hands on the dip of her hips. She stood completely motionless, staring up at me as I tried to start up our dance once again.

"What's your na-" I abruptly realized what she wanted to ask and tried to redirect the conversation. I wouldn't let her know the name of her murderer…not yet.

"C'mon, you're not going to make me start all over again." I rocked my hands against her hips and her words were lost. We danced to the hypnotic beats of the music, her spellbinding violet orbs peered passionately at me. Her eyes were seemingly trusting, but I knew her heart was somewhere else.

I could slowly feel the animalistic need to feed rising up within me. My fingers started twitching at her hips, my eyes ravenously raked over the areas of the most concentrated blood flow, and my mind was screaming _'Take her! Feed!' _

Correction, that wasn't my mind that was that _thing's_.

Regardless, I needed to get her out of the throngs of people and outside.

I pulled her to me, celebrating her warmth against me, and asked "Can we go somewhere a little more private?" Now, I was telling the complete truth and whether or not she misinterpreted what I meant was her fault.

That's right, this was all her fault.

* * *

He pulled me to the doorway, grinning the entire time. I followed, almost tripping over my heels on the way out…that earned a chuckle from him. The entire time I had felt as if a sheet had been thrown over me. I had been entranced by him, but as we walked out into the fresh air, it felt as if the curse had been lifted.

He really was gorgeous, and I had truly enjoyed myself throughout the evening, but this had to stop. He was nothing more than a stranger to me and that's all he ever would be. He would not come home with me tonight, he would not touch me any further, he would not get anymore than the dance he had already had.

He turned to me "Rukia, I-"

I cut him off "Thank you for the good time tonight, but I should be going. Goodbye…uh." I turned to his slightly shocked expression, shrugged and began to walk away.

I brought my hand to my thigh, ready to use my already found out dagger, should this man try anything to stop me. Just to make sure, I turned around and waved once more with a wonderfully plastic smile… had his eyes gotten brighter…?

"Rukia," he called, "The name's Kurosaki, Kurosaki Ichigo."

And he was in front of me.


End file.
